On the Road Again

Well, I wake up in the morning

There's frogs inside my socks

Your mama, she's a-hidin'

Inside the icebox

Your daddy walks in wearin'

A Napoleon Bonarparte mask

Then you ask why I don't live here

Honey, do you have to ask ?

Well, I got to pet your monkey

I get a face full of claws

I ask who's in the fireplace

And you tell me Santa Claus

The milkman comes in

He's wearing a derby hat

And you ask why I don't live here

Honey, how come you have to ask me that ?

Well, I asked for something to eat

I'm hungry as a hog

So I get brown rice, seaweed

And a dirty hot dog

I've got a hole

Where my stomach disappeared

Then you ask why I don't live here

Honey, I gotta think you're really weird.

Your grandpa's cane

It turns into a sword

Your grandma prays to pictures

That are pasted on a board

Everything inside my pockets

Your uncle steals

And you ask me why I don't live here

Honey, I can't believe that you're for real.

Well, there's fist fight in the kitchen

They're enough to make me cry

The mailman comes in

Even he's gotta take a side

Even the butler

He's got something to prove

Then you ask me why I don't live here

Honey, how come you don't move ?