Arthur's Day

Diageo Diageo have mounted a Crusade

Creating Arthur's Day, they've suckered us into their charade

Start 'em off on Alco-Pops tastes just like lemonade

Get 'em into the hit while they're young and none the wiser

Diageo pump the volume up on Arthur's Day

With The Manic Street Preachers, Primal Scream, Tom Jones and David Gray

To flog their alcohol, they're revving the youngsters up for a mighty spree

Twitter and Facebook telling them where The Mumford's 'r going to be

Happy happy happy happy Arthur's Day

It's such... a Happy clappy advertising' scheme

Drink sensibly they implore us

As their Hosannas sound a never-ending chorus

'N kids get hooked on the fantasies that flash before us

Arthurs Alcoholiday is coming round again

He's the patron saint of porter canonized by the Advertising' Men

The medics in the ambulance 'll be working overtime

The A&E 'll be like a drunk tank in the firing line

While Diageo goes AWOL at closing time