I Did It for Alfie

Rejoice, just rejoice at that news

This girl has got the midlife blues

She lost her favourite marble again

It rolled down the nearest drain

A swing to the right and she's under attack

Much-sought-after property, completely detached

Plunging at the neck and daring at the back

And everybody says she looks better like that

Everybody says she looks better like that

Everybody says she looks better like that

Everybody says she looks better like that

Everybody says she looks better like that

Rejoice, just rejoice at that news

This girl was split completely in two

Trevor, knock me down with a feather

In the United Kingdom of Whatever

With a clean-cut center parting and a bloodrush to the head

"You won't get any older, dear," is what the stylist said

It's elegant bold and striking, she'll never need a hat

And everybody says she looks better like that

Everybody says she looks better like that

Everybody says she looks better like that

Everybody says she looks better like that

Everybody says she looks better like that

Alfie, I did it for Alfie

Alfie, I did it for Alfie

Alfie, I did it for Alfie