The Land Of Do What You're Told

Have a word with your Patron Saint

Cover up the cracks with a lick of paint

All the exits are all double-locked

Because St Sebastian sways but doesn't rock

Here's to you - you put up a fight

You're the last to leave, now turn out the light

You danced to the Devil and the Feathery wife

Now the Ordnance Survey is mapping out your life

Look at the small print: it's what we agreed -

Sign your name before we teach you how to read

This is the land, the Land of Do What You're Told

The Land of the Free: if you don't leave the fold

Smile a little wider as you're waiting to be sold

This is the land, the Land of Do What You're Told

I'm a celebrity - let me in here

One last jump from the end of the pier

We breached the wall, but I was too tired to run

My Get Up And Go got up and now it's gone

Look at the small print: it's what we agreed -

Sign your name before we teach you how to read

This is the land, the Land of Do What You're Told

With a little lip service to breaking the mould

Smile a little wider as you're waiting to be sold

This is the land, the Land of Do What You're Told

(We're going on strike for twelve per cent

We're not downhearted yet

They're filming it all for a reality show

So twelve per cent we'll get)