Where Are You

I’m staring at your picture dad

Pulling up the past

Trying to learn about this father that I never had

So young, so wrong, and ye gone

It’s only, me, mom Virginia & God

Were all alone, and our leader is not home

The crossroads took you or these demons below

I’m feeling the cold, you were not here, not there

When I had my first fight I was so scared

When I had my first kiss I could not share

I was lost and the school they did not care

Why’d you leave me, hanging from the ceiling?

Angels stopped singing and mom’s not sleeping

I’m not bitter or mad, I’m just missing a dad

Sitting here thinking, praying wishing you back

These feeling are wack, almost too much to bare

I know your souls alive I just want to know where

Are you

Why did you leave me

Where are you

Were you thinking of me dad

Are you

Do you love me

Where are you

Than where are you if you do

Well I’m all grown up now moved out a P-Town

Married this girl, mom said you’d be so proud

I even slimmed down I’m hanging with a new crowd

If only you’re around, you’d see what I can do now

I travel the globe, singing bringing a hope

Through hip hop rocking roll lifting the soul

They say I look like you, your smile & eyes too

I got moms hair thank God I was frightful

I know you can’t come back from the past

But the fact that you left and the damage is bad

I don’t know if mom fears or if she ever got healed

Or if she blames you and God over the years

You were my dad, and I was your son

If only you new what it was like growing up

When I look at the sky I get this thought in my mind

And wonder what it be like if your still alive

I’m still trying figure out what when on in the house

What voice was talking loud what made you kill yourself?

Was it something I did, I said, as little kid?

Something like a fib that you can’t forgive?

My life was so hard lost my only body guard

Slowly God healed the scars let’s say you left a mark

I’ve had the same thoughts that talked to you, Talk to me,

I had to see a shrink but now I’m back on my feet

I battle thoughts with words, using psalms & verbs

A new rebirth no longer Am I insecure

I heard a voice say I’ll never leave ye

But I didn’t see ye I’ve forgotten you like amnesia

I believe I’ll see you some where in heaven

Where we can talk and I can ask you a question

But for now, I’m a move on be strong

And make sure I’m there for my own son