Spanky

I was the cutest kid, man, you should've seen me

People pinched my cheeks, they wanted me on TV

When puberty premiered I felt weird and started eating

Weight accumulated, never sated, always feeding

I was a fat kid... back in the '80s

I liked french fries, no aioli, no gravy

I wouldn't share (uh-uh) no matter your name

The fatter I became the sadder I sat ashamed

Picked last, no friends, called fat at the table

My father found no fault because he's also enabled

Food'll fix it was the ticket but that made matters worse

Now I'm the current carrier of a corpulent curse

No matter what the dish is only wish is it's hot

Metabolism was malicious, it was slower than sloths

Every bite became a burden, every servin' was unnervin'

Starving kids in China remind ya you don't deserve it

Too little for larges, too massive for medium

People look at me and say "What the f*ck are they feedin' him?"

They don't design these dungarees 32 by 28

So I'm rolling up my cuffs and I'm feeling overweight

Other kids were even bigger but somehow succeeded socially

I wanted to be popular obviously wasn't supposed to be

I was hoping we could openly obsess over obesity

I'm always losin' weight that's why I say "You want a piece of me?"

Addiction introduction my affliction was fat

Wore a shirt when I went swimming, a slimming effect on my flab

Locker rooms were lethal tombs, my body would be exposed

While they'd creep into the showers, secretly slip on all my clothes

In the winter of my years it appears I'm a simple fool

Life is in the middle, problems the same as middle school

Always feelin' empty even though I'm feelin' full

A treat will try to tempt me, it's deadly, I'm seeing skulls

Back in Brooklyn I was broken, I'd watch joggers from the window

Never believe it, couldn't do Wii Fit; I was anemic on Nintendo

But then I jogged a single mile, you should've seen my dentals

My limits were just figments; turns out everything is mental

Too little for larges, too massive for medium

People look at me and say "What the f*ck are they feedin' him?"

They don't design these dungarees 32 by 28

So I'm rolling up my cuffs and I'm feeling overweight