If I Was A Man

I bought myself some sexy lingerie

But I'm gonna take it back

'Cause the only ones who have seen it on me

Are the salesgirl and my cat

Saturday night and I'm alone again

Yeah it's always the same old thing

Well that telephone in my left hand

Is still waiting on a ring

I got a lovin' heart

And people say I'm pretty smart

It shouldn't have to be this hard

If I was a man

I'd be sending me flowers

Wouldn't rush out of bed

No, I'd hold me for hours

Wouldn't run around town

And leave my baby at home

Wouldn't mind me a girl

With some meat on her bones

I'd love me just as I am

If I was a man

Well I've tucked a plucked

And done all I can

Tryin' to look like a movie star

But I'm washing off this spray on tan

And I'm burning my push-up bra

I got two sweet lips

Just a aiming to be kissed

But lately it's been hit and miss

If I was a man

I'd be sending me flowers

Wouldn't rush out of bed

No, I'd hold me for hours

But then again

The sensitive kind

That'd watch a sad movie

That ain't scared to cry

Would probably leave me

For some other guy

If I was a man

If I was a man

If I was a man

Oh if I was a man