National Express

Take the National Express when your life's in a mess

It'll make you smile

All human life is here

From the feeble old dear to the screaming child

From the student who knows that to have one of those

Would be suicide

To the family man

Manhandling the pram with paternal pride

And everybody sings 'ba ba ba da'

We're going where the air is free

On the National Express there's a jolly hostess

Selling crisps and tea

She'll provide you with drinks and theatrical winks

For a sky-high fee

Mini-skirts were in style when she danced down the aisle

Back in '63 (yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah)

But it's hard to get by when your arse is the size

Of a small country

And everybody sings 'ba ba ba da'

We're going where the air is free

Tomorrow belongs to me

When you're sad and feeling blue

With nothing better to do

Don't just sit there feeling stressed

Take a trip on the National Express, the National Express, let's go